I was meant to be of darkness. It long sprouted in me all the years I was struggling to adorn what I called my soul with what they called light and what they called mercy.
“As I understand practical Satanic philosophy, self-confidence is certainly a virtue, but arrogance is a definite pitfall. There is a wide difference between each of these characteristics. Confidence means that one is sure of their beliefs, and is not really threatened by a challenge. Therefore, the tone of the conversation can be civil and productive. Arrogance means that one is threatened by another’s beliefs, and that the arrogant person does not respect the free will of the other person in a conversation.”
… I’ll remember you are human too and used to be my brother before your freedom was robbed and sold in an exchange of an illusory salvation.
Back in the time we all were children of Old Gods so you are still my brother. If you are Christian I will remember you are an outcast, unrooted from your own body, plucked from earth and thrown on the verge of asphalted roads to wither in a Sun that cannot nourish you anymore.
I will feel sorry – for you, for me, for the mankind, but I will still love you in the name of the Dark Mother who brought us all into being by the will of the Divine.
If you are Christian I will embrace your fragility, fear, clinging on “light’ and I will remember I was just like you before having the strength to stand under the lightless sky and call the Divine on their True Name.
If you are Christian I will see you as an weaker render of me and I will hold space for you, brother.
If you are Christian I will love your light in the name of the Darkness and if needed I would do it with the violent grip of demons who hold me whole when I summon Void an Chaos themselves. I will not expect you to understand either.
Come, brother, sit with me, by my Pagan fire, and let us remember the time we hold together to warm up in the howling terror of ancient nights, before the caves who would shelter us, like the very womb of the Goddess.
Ave Satanis! 🖤
Belial: Sex is simply a way to organize energies. Among many others. Emotions, feelings, arts, fights, war, spells do the same thing as well. When energies are ordered over a regular, geometric layout, there are conditions for a certain vibration to manifests itself. Living beings are just that: crossings of energy vortexes. Universe itself is the equally that for the Universe is as much alive and conscious as the individuals dwelling in it.
Certain emotions, like fear distort vibration and this is how manifesting a certain thing is blocked. Anger also my shape a certain manifestation. It gets a very specific touch (print) on the energetic pattern of the end result.
On various Left Hand Path e-groups I have seen this topic about Lucifer being actually a woman. Either people have seen a woman on their visions (or they have felt a female energy) when attempted to call forth Lucifer or, in other cases was merely an intellectual doubt, originated in ancient myths, either in more recent ways the Abrahamic theologians regard such concepts as sin, soul, temptation, gender roles even and so on. At first I thought that possibly those who are asking themselves such a question like ‘Is Lucifer a woman?’ actually perceived the presence of the Goddess Lilith, in some traditions regarded as Satan/Lucifer’s wife. I also was advised, on an e-group where I told about my relation with Hecate, to equate Her with the Goddess Lilith, which I failed. I perceive them as kin though different energies. Also I am aware Lilith appears in many forms and had even more aspects throughout mankind’s history.
Today I came across two very interesting videos that seem to shed some light on the topic about Lucifer being actually a woman. Although I don’t totally agree with this (I perceive Lucifer as male cosmic energy, while Satan is alot more earthly aspect – also male – of the same deity), I share those videos for the readers interested about the topic.
Sophia (Lucifer) is MYSTERY, Babylon the Great
It’s not always for the tough, or just because somebody wants knowledge and power. Sometimes, for some of us it so happens that we can’t understand and can’t keep it going. We want Good but The Good doesn’t want us. Something just doesn’t bind, sometimes, and when it is so, one starts asking themselves what’s wrong.
You close your eyes and pray, meditate. The meaning still fails to congeal and it just spins around in the darkness of the mind, like a row of fading shapes, without any meaning. And then, you supplicate for a break no matter how short but the life keeps hewing into you – just another of billion vivisections that occur on the planet, without any alleviation. And then, excruciatingly sharp, a long forgotten promise shows up, a word uttered back in the lonely childhood, spent under the terror of an abusive parent. A never kept promise, some repent then trowed in a hidden corner of self for so many years. After it hits, you start to pray to Rebellious with the fervor you should beseech the Savior. Not to be better – not this one more time, not even to stop the pain for a bit. Only that: may He never forsake you, may He never throw you – not now, nor in the future eternities – to Angels. May He forever live in you. May He fill your veins with blind darkness, or with the darkness of knowledge – it doesn’t matter so much. May you never forget anymore. May you never loose Him anymore. May you never waste so much time asking yourself why. In the bathroom’s mirror you see behind a slightly faded shadow and that feels safer. You know you were listened so that He is there, looking after you.
How many hopes had to be crushed for someone to rip the very own flesh for a covenant to be sealed with blood on the red stained edge of a magical athame? How much fright and agony and terror one should gather to throw away everything that once meant hope? If it was catharsis or something else got no idea but a healing peace went down and overtook me after the black ceremony of initiation. It was the serenity I promised myself at 16 and attained at 47. The peace with my own shadow. It happened how and when I wanted – in the night of the Dark Moon when even Mercury was turned back from Earth so nobody could help me in this. I stepped alone in front of the Universe with my one intention to keep a forgotten promise. So then I trespassed the world’s border and my own boundaries too. As inward so outward, as above so below, as they say. Slowly melting, the dark candles burned the whole night and the next morning till the noon. I slept holding inside my chest the light, the pain and the warmth of their flames. Little by little, the wound on my arm heals too and I feel more and more whole every time I step betwixt mist and shadows. It feels like feeding my soul after so many long years when I had no courage or I didn’t know I have to do it.